Things Realized

One thing I have realized lately is.... I'm tired. I have lost 68 pounds and I do feel more like doing things around the house. It's been 2 months since my sweet little girl has had to do the dishes. I have also been able to do some of the laundry and a little of the mopping. So.... I'm tired. It's a good tired and I am so glad that I have been able to help out with the housework.

I haven't been able to work since 2005 so therefore, I have in no way contributed to the financial up-keep of our home. I wasn't able to do much, if any, of the up-keep of our home. All of the money brought in, was from Ronnie's hard work. His work takes him away from home at least 3-4 days a week. It's lonely for him and for Meredith and me. Poor Meredith, went to school, maintained an A-B average, was involved with her church activities and with drama, but she cleaned the house, did the laundry, cooked and cared for me during this time.  I have realized.... that I am no longer sure of what my place is anymore. This makes me sad.

I have realized.... that life is not fair and can be cruel. Illness took so many things from me, my independence, my ability to contribute and my self confidence. The government has ruled that I am
not entitled to my disability and this adds to my lack of self confidence and ability to help with our finances. This make me angry.

Well.... I am not going to let this get me down. The Lord has blessed me and I am thankful, so.... I will try harder to do more to help out around here. I may have to rest in between but, that's okay. God is in control and He will give me what I need.

I have realized.... Life is too short to waste it on what is in the past.