LET IT GO....

I have to vent.... I don't want this to sound as if I'm paranoid or sensitive, but there are some things
that I don't like.

Ronnie and Meredith are still making their little snide comments and giving each other these little looks. It's like I'm on the outside of their little circle. They talk about things that I don't even know about. If I ask, they ignore me. If I start to say something, they interrupt or they say they don't really care. Meredith is really bad about talking smart or calling me down! Her dad farts at the table (so does she), or slides down in his recliner and farts and stinks the entire room up, and she never calls him down. Tonight, my stomach was a little upset and I had gas, and you would have thought I had farted out loud in church. My gosh.... I went for over a year and could not fart, because of the problems I was having with diarrhea, it's actually a relief to be able to pass gas. It's a constant pick, complain or criticize.

Yesterday was Easter Sunday (3/27/16), and we had to sing for all 3 services and be there, in our seat, by 7:45am. It was raining and cold, but we were doing great on the time. However, for some reason, Ronnie was driving like a maniac (as usual). He was in the left lane, that bears to the right to go to 26 and to the church or you can stay straight and go to Greenville. Well, for some unknown reason, he stayed in the lane to go straight, and I told him that he needed to watch where he was going, and he said "I'm in the groove!" Oh no he wasn't, he ran over the markers in the road that let you know you've missed the turn and then into a big hole. We bumped up and down and then he finally got back into the lane. The tire pressure light came on, and half way over the bridge to get down on 26.... the left rear tire went flat. I didn't mention until later, that my foot had gone up under the dash. I have a bruise on the top of my foot. But that's not the bad part.... the rim is bent and the spare looks like it came off of a junk heap!! We called Justin, he came and picked us up and we were at church in plenty of time. SO THERE WAS NO REASON FOR HIM TO BE DRIVING LIKE AN IDIOT!!
He says, that the light from my mirror had blinded him and that the car in the right lane had tried to cut him off!! HE IS SO FULL OF SHIT AND HE WILL NEVER EVER TAKE THE BLAME FOR HIS STUPIDIY!! MY TIRE IS FLAT AND THE RIM IS BENT, and if I had been driving, he would still be raising hell. Did Miss Sissy say anything? Oh hell no, but she would have been chewing me out too!!

Now to the neighbors. I know that I said some really horrible things, a few weeks back, when Mindy was cussing at Jeff, yelling and screaming about Meredith's classmates parking over in their yard. I should have just left for my LBJ dinner, and not have gone over there. But, Meredith was so upset and embarrassed, and this was the second time that Mindy had made a big scene in front of Meredith's friends, even going so far as to call some of them "niggers!" I really tried to talk to Mindy, but she started screaming and cussing and beating on the inside of my car window.  I let myself get pulled down, I lost control and I AM SO SO VERY SORRY!!  I have apologized, Mindy apologized, and I apologized to Jeff in a text message, because I haven't seen him. I spoke to them at Phoenix's party and I have waved to them from the porch. I even sent them an anniversary text. Today Parker was swinging Rush outside. I called out.... "Hey Parker!" I said it twice, then I kind of yelled it. He looked at me and said.... "What?" I yelled it again and waved, he just turned his head and mumbled "hey." Another thing, Justin and Jordan act like I have upset them, but I can't think of anything. Then.... I realized.... they are upset and embarrassed about what happened and the things I said.

I WAS WRONG.... I AM SO SORRY!!  I am not perfect, I lost control.

PLEASE DEAR HEAVENLY FATHER.... PLEASE FORGIVE ME.... I WAS WRONG.... I AM SO SORRY.